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Tuesday, October 5, 2010

International Dude Week (Day 2) : Interview with the Author of "The Dude Veda"

Welcome to Day 2 of The International Dude Week. Today we will have an exclusive interview with Senior Khabri Ladkibaaz Larry Stinson who is the author of the much awaited "The Dude Veda". The Dude Veda is said to be an ultimate source of salvation for all guys of CVRCE and around for ending all the atrocities committed against them by the Chicks. Seems that the Chick Godesses became too tensed and concerned about this uprising of the Dudes. So she tried her best to stop this moment by creating a Thunderstorm in Bhubaneswar. That Didn't Work. Power Cut. We had Inverters. Net Disconnection. We went to the cyber Cafes to post this. This time the Dudes wont accept Defeat. Dick & Harry decided to call Larry for an interview after the huge response the trailer got. As usual they asked Tom to call who changes his SIM every second day(SIM changing rate of Tom is second only to Bin Laden). So they used the unknown Tom's number to call Larry . Larry after the huge success of the trailer went all the way to Cuttack to get some booze & celebrate alone as all the others Khabris were out of town. Larry at 9:30 filled with hangover recieved the call the caller tune rang "Humko peeni hai peeni hai humko peeni hai".
Dick- Hi Larry, Dick here.
Larry-What?! "Dick is here", very calm & safe.
Dick-WTF! I am Dick you scumbag.
Larry-What type of man calls him a "Dick"?
Dick - This is Senior Khabri Dahara Dick calling you for your interview on the Dude Veda
(After hearing the word "Dude" a big thunder struck & Larry almost pissed in his pants & regained his senses)
Here are excerpts of the interview.

Q: Why have you added this extra 'Stinson' surname to your name?
A: What Tendulkar is to cricketers the same is Stinson is to all the Dudes. Recently I had a dream that when I was born there was a "Stinson" locket attached with my name. The first name that I ever uttered is nothing but "Stinson". No monkey language to start with.Later on after my 4th breakup I went on a fact finding mission to know who I am and what is wrong in me? And I came to know that I'm a descendant of the great Stinsons. And Barney Stinson of "How I Met Your Mother" is my long lost Brother.And he is my single biggest inspiration to wite this Dude Veda.

Q: Ok. Tell our readers what to expect from "The Dude Veda"?
A:The Dude Veda is a 200+ page guide catering to the following topics.
    1. Helping Nudes to be converted into Dudes
    2. Creating Unity among the Dudes to fight this tough war for Pride and Honor against the Chicks.
    3. Innovative and foolproof ways to trap Chicks.
    4. Formulating a large set of rules. Otherwise known as the Dude Code Of Conduct which will act as a constitution for all Dudes.
    Q:And the concept is you are reforming people. Is it real ? Nude(Not-Dude) to Dude. Are you seriously reforming them? And just a brief description how you will do it.
    A:Well, we the Stinsons are born with only one purpose to kill all Nudity(Not-Dudity,does not include porn at all). For that transition the Nudes must burn all those Love Story Books & Text Books they have there at their place & start reading my "Dude Veda". They may also have to give away the Scooty they are riding & the need to quit drinking blue stuff with a tiny plastic umbrella in it on a long glass. Those who were crossed all the limits of Not-Dudity they will all be converted to chicks to improve the sex-ratio.
    Q:So are you planning to be a hermit? Coz it seems like you are preaching a religion? Are you quitting the post of the Senior Khabri in CVRCE Diary?
    A:No. My first mission is to convert all the Khabris into Dudes. Because as of now except me All the Khabris are Nudes. One is running after the Chicks always while the other is using the CVRCE Diary Gmail Account to anonymously flirt with Junior Chicks. This has to end.  
    Q: We saw those awesome stunts you have done in that video. Well are those real? The stunts were so awesome that we had to wear wear helmets even while watching the trailer.   
    A: Yes. Absolutely. All stunts were real. Earlier I was a Nude (Non-Dude). But Barney Stinson taught me all those awesome stunts. He is My Dude-Guru. I even heard that Altaf Raja Bankiya and Shoe-Case Dash have become numb after watching the trailer. For this achievement only I should to be greeted by all Ladies of CVRCE. True Story.
    Q: We want to ask u why this weird caller tune? We were expecting some Real 'Dudish' Callback Tune. But WTF is this? Last time it was"Teri Ore". That's so Not Dude.
    A: I am running short of partners for Booze nights so i have set this caller Tune this is an indirect booze night request to all even to the company HR who was impressed after listening this. About "Teri Ore" that is what chicks do while they take your phone to inspect your inbox they secretly change your awesome caller tune to some of thier fav chick-song. Chicks suck. (No Pun Intended)
    Q: Lastly any words for our readers?
    A: It's the time to stop being ORDINARY and start becoming LEGENDARY. So log on to CVRCE Diary this Sunday and download  "The Dude Veda", your key to Dudish Salvation.