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Wednesday, September 22, 2010

Why CVRCE is Cooler than 3 Idiots’ ICE?

Behti hawa sa tha woh...udti patang sa tha woh...kahaan gaya use...

{White Noise}three-idiots

Oh wait. Still listening to this song? And getting inspired by the life of Wangdu? Still want a life like him? Still comparing your friend circle with those 3 idiots? Then please wake up. Shame on you for making these dumbasses your role models. They are just overrated guys. An overrated system. Have you looked at your own friends at CVRCE? Come on let’s have a look and I bet you will find this 3 Idiots movie not as awesome in front of our CVRCE. So read on why the ICE college of 3 Idiots sucks and why our college CVRCE rocks…!

The Dumbass, Flawed and Pointless Final year projects of ICE Students

  • ·         Joy's Four-Wing-Wala-Spy-Helicopter is a piece of trash. Let’s face it. A helicopter with 4 rotors is a ridiculous idea. Low manoeuvrability, High Cost, and ridiculous and it’s not innovative at all. Robbie Funda's Bot is better than Joy's Bot. I know that's useless too. But at least it had some cell-phone mumbo jumbo in it. It at least sounds cooler. And for God's sake! No fucking dude of CVRCE would even show a hint of tension if he/she is not being able to meet the project deadline let alone committing suicide. He simply will download/ buy a new one from Kukurmar Mallik! Joy is such a Loser. He would never even clear the first round of Roadies...

  • ·         The Virus Inverter- Are you kidding me? You call that a project? Seriously? Stealing a lot of Car Batteries and connecting them in series to create power source? And that too For a Laptop?! This is insane. All Electrical Engineers who saw the Baby Delivery scene almost committed suicide. Even the worst project of Electrical Branch i.e. Dhoti Shaker Padhee's Ulta-Ghoomne-Wala-Fan made more sense. So did All-Esha Mohanty’s Cow Counting sensor. (More on all the weird projects by CVRCE guys later on.) 

The Ragging Ideas sucks big time in ICE

  1. ·         First thing first. What is this obsession of Raj Kumar Hirani with Underwear? In Munnabhai MBBS, he showed us the juniors (and later the seniors too) dancing in their underwear to a Devdas song. And in 3 Idiots he continued the underwear obsession with the ragging scene.

  2. ·         Learn some innovative ragging ideas from us CVRCE peeps! Shaktiman performances with sound effects, The CV Raman Salute, The Positions, The Main Super Man Hoon, The Stage acts, The QA Rounds to name a few. Our ragging system is much more interesting than theirs.

  3. ·         Okay. Whatever our ragging system might be we never give our seniors an electric shock up their wee wee when they pee pee (which they don’t) in the doors of our hostel rooms!

  4. ·         Guys! Learn to give some respect to your seniors. And please don’t electrocute them when they are relieving themselves. Even if it is on your door. (Which by the way isn't possible due to some inconsistency in some geeky electrical theory. Whatever)

No Hot Kudiyaans in ICE

  • ·        Forget 'Hot'. There are no girls in '3 Idiots' altogether. How on Earth one is supposed to read in a college that has almost no girls in it? I guess there was no IT or AEI branch in that college. Guys do feel lucky that CVRCE at least has four buses full of Girls! *Amen* I would prefer CVRCE over ICE any day. Maybe ICE didn’t have an IT or AEI branch.

On teacher's day CVRCE junta do naach-gaana & manoranjan of teachers not baltkar like in ICE. We also have cooler guests like local hot RJ's rather than some tharki minister.

We have cooler toppers than ICE

  • ·         Our 2nd positioned toppers don’t act like morons, drink vodka and take loser oaths to get back on the topper.

  • ·         Our toppers don’t pee on the mailbox of the principal with their friends and wake up drunk in the class next day.

  • ·         Our toppers don’t try to woo the Princy's Chick. Correction./ All our toppers are chicks.

  • ·         Our Toppers don’t take bath in the public lawn like Wangdu. We use the Bathrooms.

We have a better Cheating/Copying system than the ICE guys

  • ·         This is one department where ICE fails miserably against CVRCE. Can't they think straight? What is the need to take so much risk to leak the exam papers when we have so many easier and more effective ways defined by The Mechanical and The Chemical people? Dancer Khan from Mech. is well known around the circles by taking micro Xerox of entire books to the exam hall. Kukurmar Mallik from IT does Double micro Xerox. In fact he has the mind-blowing ability to write an entire module in a 2 inch piece of paper. Grapevine has it that La Louvre art museum of Paris is after those unique chits. And during back paper exams 50-60 students as for backup for 10-20 students giving exams. 

  • ·         And our college has special partnership with the Techno School for leaking Back Paper Exams. We don’t break into the principal's room to get the exam papers. That's plain stupid.

  • ·         During internals we apply even simpler but effective methods like additional shit exchange, basic bench scribbles, and wall graffiti or even sometime we directly write the answers in the blackboard. Pretty Straightforward. No fuss.

We don’t have cool enough principals ever but at least he comes in his own car (sometimes in the college ambulance too!) and roams around in the campus in the golf cart unlike the ICE principal who uses a stone aged bicycle.

Wangdu and his friends used to drink cheap desi rum and vodka. CVRCE guys drink better quality booze at West End, TDS, Dezire, Liquid,etc. We have Standard!

The 'Tofa Kabul Karo'  Parampara

  • ·         Raj Kumar Hirani's Obsession with underwear is back again. Let’s face it. Stripping your pants and showing your ugly butt/ dirty underwear in the middle of the corridor to your friend ain't cool. It’s plain disgusting. Especially when your friend is with his girlfriend. I think it would have been a better idea if the Tofa Kabul Karo act was done by Kareena.

No Hot Lady teachers in ICE- We at least had MyNameLisa and Angie Jolie with us! Those made us attend quite a few classes.

Everyone knows that nose never comes between while kissing. At least everyone in CVRCE knows that.

CVRCE guys don’t let their friends disappear in front of their eyes in the day of convocation.

Finally! CVRCE has the CVRCE Diary Blog!

Finally a message for you guys. Please please please stop sending SMS related to 3YOU GUYS ROCK idiots. They were PJs from the start. When inspiration is in your home then why you searching for it in these 3 geeks? "AAL IZZ WELL" never heals. It’s just another crappy line like "SO JAA BETA WARNA GABBAR AA JAAYEGA" and dumbs used to get convinced by that. Please never try to give your interview in Raju style else you will end up getting beaten by the interviewer (That explains why Hatasia Harry is still Jobless). Don’t update your social site tags as "IM THE 4TH IDIOT". Come on. Ain’t being CVRCEian is enough. Be proud to be CVRCEian. Be proud of your friends. Be proud of your days back in college. You spent a way cooler life in CVRCE than Wangdu ever did at ICE. You are way cooler than Wangdu and his minions.  Raise a toast to yourself tonight. Amen!