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Thursday, December 3, 2009

12 Out of 120? (Part 1)The misery of Mechies

Hello Friends! Touter Tom Here! I’m back to my sarcastic ways [B-)]. My last post on IT guys was quite a hit created quite some wild controversies. This in fact encourages me to venture into newer hunting grounds. Helping me in this post will be Dahara Dick and Anvil Screwwalla (Freelance Guptchar, Mech Dept). Before I start off, I‘d like to convey a message to one and all. 

“NEITHER ANY BRANCH OR SOCIETY IS BEING SPECIALLY TARGETTED

NOR ANY OF THEM WILL BE SPARED !”

I would like to echo want my fellow friend Sally said in her interview yesterday“DIL PE MAT LE YAAR!” Now let’s zero in on our today’s bakra. There were quite a few requests asking for a post on mechanical people. Friends, we cannot afford to miss out on you guys. One thing worth mentioning here is, MECH people have been the most sporting of the lot. Let’s see if that fact changes after this post!

The Mechies pride themselves on calling themselves a ‘Royal Branch’. This is quite confusing. I mean, they don’t have the building which has any qualities of a palace

  • All the toilet rooms smells of horse pee.

  • They don’t have a big enough porch to do khatti. (Well they have a big enough lawn, but it is mostly used as a lovers’ park!)

  • The water coolers don’t work most of the time.

Though we have to admit that the auditorium is an awesome place to have classes at. I mean we can sleep at the last bench undetected by even the strictest of teachers. Anyway one more thing that makes life miserable at mechanical is…

“12 out of 120! YOUR SEX RATIO ROCKS! ”

Out of the 12 most are already committed to guys of other branches. Mechanical Engineering had done kanyadaan to CS three times. Poor Mech. boys are left with only a balcony and a veranda, which they utilize to the fullest. Tell me honestly girls, How many of you are wary of passing close to their buildings due to the comments passed on by these unfortunate boys who are wrongly deprived of a fundamental right of jawani?! Sally is one of them for the record (Just Kiddin’)! Yeah, one thing in which they are absolutely unbeatable in is their maturity (PUN ABSOLUTELY INTENDED [;)]). BTW, it’s not their fault. After all they follow UGC principle that is screened every morning on DOORDARSHAN which says…

Padhne Likhneki Koi Umar Nahi Hoti”

But frankly friends, I sympathize with these fellows. I mean they are made scapegoats in every other occasion.

  • IT and ETC guys fought. But the Mechies had to visit the famed DisCO!

  • CSE, IT, ETC guys get away with projects downloading pirated versions of the software from the internet, at no or very minimal cost, but (grapevine has it that) the Mechies guys spend close to Rs.40000 on one project. Now this is ‘SARASAR NA-INSAAFI’.

  • They gave shelter to the IT people in the Freshers’ week but ended up locked inside Mayfair for not paying the bills. Inside reports state that the Mechies has stated a breakage amount of Rs. 15000

One will never be able to find sections as diff as ME1 and ME2. They are poles apart. In ME2; teachers struggle to get a class in…In ME1; teachers get bored seeing the same old faces every day, asking ridiculously silly doubts. One more problem in mechanical is mass participation. Here are a few examples…

  • Mass bunks translates into at least 5 nerds doing the class.
  • Group photo for Blazer day means 5-6 whackoes jumping around a car in blazers.
  • Branch picnic means 5-6 people going to some dumb place in a car.

Now some achievements of the Mechies.

  • Leaders in the mass bunk industry. They are the pioneers of keeping this tradition alive.

  • The undisputed gurus in initiating strikes, without which our college will seem so dull.

  • The Legend of the ‘PUNCH’ will be remembered for ages to come.

  • Highest attendance in the Famed DisCo.

Wait for the next post in which I am going to expose quite a few famous or rather infamous personalities…Till den enjoy da blog…Keep your comments pouring in !

Signing Off…

Touter Tom (Senior Khabri)

With inputs from

Dahara Dick (Senior Khabri)

& Anvil Screwwalla (Freelance Guptchar, Mech Dept)

COMING SOON: ROYAL BASHING: 12 OUT OF 120. WTF? Part 2 (Personal Attacks included)